If you are going through a divorce, then you know that there will be many difficult conversations up along the way. Many couples decide to go through a divorce because they can no longer communicate with their spouse civilly. Yet, many attorneys still encourage spouses to speak with their ex, to encourage a better co-parenting relationship and attain a better understanding of their particular wants and wishes at this time.
For the most part, you can rely on your attorney to take care of a variety of situations for you, and that includes speaking on your behalf when it comes to engaging in the difficult conversations. Unfortunately, you will encounter many of these conversations along the way, and we encourage patient, open, honest communication because we know that it is meant to benefit you in the long run.
Some of Our Tips
It can be daunting to think about having awkward conversations about your divorce. You have to do it with confidence and strength, as not only will you need to speak with your spouse, but also with your children. It is certainly a skill to learn how to speak with people, no matter their age. There are many things we know our loved ones do not want to hear, and maybe we avoid the conversations because we wish not to cause a rift or add more conflict to an already heated situation.
Below, we offer some tips to help you discuss those difficult conversations in a divorce.
Focus on the bigger picture.
There are many elements to argue about in your divorce. While you should be taking the time to smooth over larger issues, don’t throw in the towel or go along with something with which you do not agree. Make decisions based on what you think will provide the most benefits in the long run.
Difficult conversations become harder when you hide your feelings or try to put on a brave face, knowing that does little resolve any issues. Being open about how you feel only helps your case to progress.
Be clear about your intentions.
Anytime you are settling your divorce case your intentions must be true. Do not take conversations as the time to bring up ancient history, rehash an old argument, or try to implement some hidden agenda. Again, this a return to the element of remaining completely honest, not the time to scheme or manipulate the direction of your divorce case.
Have realistic expectations.
Some spouses use their divorce as a chance to create new opportunities for themselves. It is good to have expectations that you have a blank slate on which to build a new future. However, don’t think that your divorce will provide you with sumptuous spousal support payments and other perks. Your spouse may not always agree with the terms, either, so be fair and be realistic about what you hope to achieve.
Is it the right time?
Sometimes a conversation runs smoother if you catch the person at just the right time. Make sure you have set aside a time where you and your spouse can speak one-on-one, at a time or location where you can both give one another the attention that the matter deserves.
Get Answers to Your Divorce Questions!
As always, if you have any questions about the divorce process and what you can do to help yourself, please do not hesitate to discuss your case further with Coker, Robb & Cannon, Family Lawyers. We listen to our clients’ needs by offering attentive, personalized legal counsel. We are committed to helping you find the resolution you need to move forward with life after divorce.
We have over 95 years of combined experience and offer an initial consultation. Be sure to schedule your appointment with us today!